Kategori: İngilizce Floodlar

From r/ddlccirclejerk, by LocksmithOK1674 "natsuki feet lover"

I NEED A NATSUKI FOOT JOB!!!

I'm back, sorry about yesterday! To make it up to y'all, I have a true NSFW post today! (It's not gonna be straight up porn, don't worry.)

I NEED IT. I would fight in WWII 10 times just for the chance to feel her feet on me. It would transcend pleasure. I don't think I'd be the same person. I don't care if it cause me to go to hell for eternity or whatever. That singular moment would be the highlight of my life.

It would start with me and Natsuki baking, and h...Devamını Oku

I frequently have fantasies of a central asian specifically usbek man making sweet love to me while spoon feeding me plov

I'm a 34 yo KHHV by choice because i don't find 99.999% of women attractive.

Seriously, out of the thousands of women I've seen, I've only found 3 women attractive in my life. Every other woman is about as attractive to me as a chair.

I think a major part of it is I'm just not attracted to the human form. I'm super attracted to dragons, and my "standards" for dragons is much lower. I'd say I'm attracted to 50% of dragons I see. I'm not a furry and I don't find anthro furry stuff attractive (not even anthro dragons). I just find dragons super ...Devamını Oku

If I waffle a stroopwafel, will it waffle? Let's waffle the waffle in waffle batter, then straight to the grid. Stamp it. That stroopwafel waffle. Made a wonderfully waffled waffle. 9.1. Good waffle.
Will a Pop-Tart waffle or will it be awful? Let's pop this tart into a beautiful batter, then send it straight to the grid. Shout out Kellogg's not a sponsor. Stamp it. That's a work of waffle art and a tasty looking tart. 8.5. It's slaps.
You've heard of chicken waffles, but if we waffle chicken, will it waffle? Let's bathe this bite-sized beauty in batter, then send i...Devamını Oku

Hello, this is based department speaking, What? A tomboy? Who likes epic men's video games like GTA? (Grand Theft Auto) AND drinks epic men's energy drinks like powerade!?! (who doesn't!) uh, yeah, NTA. A situation THIS wholesome should be classified as a 6.4 chunguses of basedess, but you know what, lets round it up to 6.9 for extra nice. (The chungus based scale is an logarithmic scale, so a 6.9 is for extra nice. for context, Fortnite (cringe!) would be -1) Anyhow, thank you, kind stranger, for reporting this based 100 woman anomaly. As compensation, you will be receiving reddi...Devamını Oku

Hey, you, looking at the screen, let me ask you a question:

Do you like awesome things that are awesome?

Then you got to play this game, dude!

It's freaking cool and crazy addicting, like popping-bubble-wrap addictive!

Check this out; See, that's your dash move:

There's a short dash, long dash, jump dash, spiral, slide.

There's probably a dash that makes you breakfast, I don't know!

"Oh, great idea!"

"Wait, what?"

Point is, you're dashing around like a freaking moonman, and I love it!

Oh, look at this, there's all these combo moves you ...Devamını Oku

According to the dumb espherical Earth HYPOTHESIS, the Earth spins at 1670Km/h, but why when I jump i fall at the same place? And there's more, unlike all you globetards, I actually study physics, I watch hundreds of Facebook and Youtube videos everyday, and I saw something about a thing that absolutely destroys the Globe Earth, its called "Angular Momentum", you guys probably never heard of that, this is advanced stuff. Why if I jump north or south, I dont get dragged horizontally because of the angular momentum? I its because the Earth flat, and this proofs that the Earth is fl...Devamını Oku

I have perfected stimfapping 😋

I have perfected it, down to the last minute detail. MDPiHP is superior for this, NO PYRO comes close to how fucking smooth this pyro is, nothing else will let you go this long and hard, not a-pvp, not mdphp, not a-pihp, they all suck for stimfapping compared to MDPiHP, but they are still miles ahead of puny shit like meth or any other stim.

MDPiHP is the best drug for stimfapping, I vape a big dose every few hours and snort lines every time I feel like I need more, if I do too much, I know because I have 50 tabs of porn open and switch videos every 2 mins w...Devamını Oku

Hello everyone, please excuse this unusual and somewhat off-topic request. We're looking for a (preferably tall) athletic woman who would be willing to kick someone in the balls for €150 (negotiable) cash to settle a bet. Here's the background: We recently played beer pong yet again, and the bet stipulates that one of the losers has to be kicked in the groin by a woman. Martial arts experience and a certain amount of courage would certainly be an advantage. It might sound pretty crazy, but this is actually real (we have video evidence). The punishment should take place soon, but can ...Devamını Oku

You know anybody can use a gun. It's quick, silent, efficient, and in the hands of someone like me quite frankly devastating a long-range. But, I prefer something a bit more, personal. That’s why I like the knife. I like to look in his eyes, as I twist it deeper and deeper watching the life drain out of him. And then I just smile stabbing him with my knife. And I think I'd make a great addition to your team here at Best Buy.

PAUL
9 months ago
I purchased TWO of these 700R4 transmissions and both were bad the car would not move in reverse it was locked up ! The first trans it blew the servo out the side of the trans while driving around the block,and the second could not even move the car off the lift ! The reverse gear was locked up like someone had the brake on.When the trans pan was dropped there was metal flakes inside the pan. When i called FTI they said yea, we know these transmissions are hit or miss! THEY DO NOT WARRANTY THERE LABOR ON ALL OF THERE TRANSMISSIONS !

Alright so I (26M) have been a huge Super Mario 64 fan for about 14 years now, and it is essentially the only video game I’ve ever played. I originally had the DS remake but when I was in high school I got myself an N64 along with an original Japanese copy of the game. I was obsessed! My entire childhood is filled with memories of speedrunning the game. I’m also a huge fan of the streamers Simpleflips, Clint Stevens, etc. and remember many a nights on Twitch in High School watching those guys. Lately with work I’ve had a lot less time to game so I haven’t really had as much time to gam...Devamını Oku

i KNO i hav hi IQ! i'm juss so AWESUM!!! 7+7 IS 77!! LOL!!! i Bet U thnk 2+2 is Fish!!! i AM teh SMART!!! mi BRAIN is so BIG its liek a freekin' PLANET!!! i can see ALL teh NUMBRS and LETTRS!!! they all BOW DOWN to ME!!! I'M teh KING of MATH and SPELLIN!!! mi TEACHRS r all JELUS cuz i'm SMARTUR than THEM!!! they tri to trick me wif HARD questons but i ALWAYS kno the ANSR!!! it's liek i can REED their MINDS!!! Thay ask me "Wut's the capitel of NORTH DAKOTA?" and i'm liek "DUH!!! it's... it's... uh... FOOTBAL!!!" they're all liek "...Devamını Oku

I used a magic spell which first tied up the foreskin to easily be overhanging by an inch and a half. Then, the magic spell grabbed an ultra-sharp obsidian blade and absolutely annihilated the skin in a clean swipe below the base of the head.

The skin FLEW away like a violent robber having his ski mask ripped off. Now, the penis didn’t even have a physical ability to cover its head no matter how hard I tried to push the skin up.

The meatus, now physically incapable of being covered, began to talk shit about me like a pair of lips knowing I couldn’t smother it with anything anymore.

>wake up from a dream

<that's a battle for dream island reference (troonslop)

>go to school

>teacher hands out paper

<that's a fundamental paper education reference (troonslop)

>we're learning about augustus caesar

<that's a king caesar reference (namefag drama)

>meet 2 classmates named joel and max who are normal people

<that's a refernce to mudslime and jew namefags

>see kids playing soccer outside

<that's a 4420ons reference (troonslop)

>count five fingers on my hand

<that's a five finger death punch reference (t...Devamını Oku

How gratifying it is to see that whenever academic intellect is challenged, even the most so-called geniuses might choose to counter it with sexual innuendo and crude jokes which are not funny at all and are in fact, rather cheap. Such kind of jokes indicating violence towards one's close family members aren't insulting to the recipient, but rather show the inherent mindset and values of the one who makes them.

These 'Yo-mama' jokes are rather popular on discord and sadly, we, instead of denouncing them are eager to carry on the vicious cycle of subtly normalizing sexual viol...Devamını Oku

‼️‼️HOLY FUCKING SHIT‼️‼️‼️‼️ IS THAT A MOTHERFUCKING PERSONA REFERENCE??????!!!!!!!!!!11!1!1!1!1!1!1! 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 PERSONA IS THE BEST FUCKING VIDEOGAME 🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯💯 JOKER IS SO BADASSSSS 😎😎😎😎😎😎😎👊👊👊👊👊 BABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABYBABY 😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩 😩😩😩😩 TAKE YOUR HEART TAKE YOUR HEART TAKE YOUR HEART TAKE YOUR HEART TAKE YOUR HEART TAKE YOUR HEART TAKE YOUR HEART 🤬😡🤬😡🤬😡🤬🤬😡🤬🤬😡ADACHIIIIIIIIIIIIII...Devamını Oku

> try to put NES cartridge in Gamecube

> stop and think about what I've done for a second

> try to put NES cartridge in Gamecube

> stop and think about what I've done for a second

> transform NES cartridge into Gameboy chip

> try to force Gameboy chip into Gamecube

> stop and think about what I've done for a second

> try to put NES cartridge in Gamecube

> contemplate my choices silently

> transform NES cartridge into Gameboy chip

> try to force Gameboy chip into Gamecube

> stop and think about what I've done for a second

> try ...Devamını Oku

You fool. You absolute buffoon. You monumental, galaxy-grade moron.
Do you have any idea—ANY idea—who you’re even daring to breathe in the same atmosphere as right now?
I am not just some random meatbag cluttering the planet. I am the nexus. The living intersection where actual power converges. While you were busy collecting participation trophies and arguing about pineapple on pizza, I was on encrypted calls with people whose names don’t appear on org charts because org charts are for peasants.
You think “connections” means you once shook hands with a city councilman at a chili co...Devamını Oku

GONG XI FUCK CAI 😩‼️

IT’S THE YEAR OF THE 🐴 HORSE 🐴

You know what that means you qipao SLUTS 👘👀

Its time to show AHGONG👲🏻👲🏻👴🏻👴🏻 your PHATTEST oranges 🍊🍊🍊😜😜😜

And get some THICCC HONGBAOS ㊗💰🈵‼️

Get your love letters 💕💕 ready for some of your 大哥’s BIG 肉乾 🍖🥓🥓🍗 and text your closest 大哥s with BIG STALLIONS🐴🐴📱📱💃💃 to come visiting 🏡💦🏡💦🏡💦

Send this to 8⃣8⃣ of your most SUPERSTITIOUS SLUTS 💰💰👲👲 and get laid HORSEY STYLE 😈🐴 🏇this CN...Devamını Oku