Kategori: İngilizce Floodlar

December 31st 2025 - I sat in my chair furiously masturbating my dick desperate to release gallons of sperm but I resisted the urge and I kept edging for 5 minutes carefully watching the clock on my PC. I waited in anticipation until finally it was 2026. I ejaculated releasing loads and loads of gooey white cum everywhere, I moaned with satisfaction, proud of my achievement.

I had just become the first person to cum in 2026. I look over my cum filled desk and chair with pride.

So all of you can go cry, because none of you will be able to claim my title of first person to cum in 2026. Go wall...Devamını Oku

Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eventually show up to defend his home. Franklin will eve...Devamını Oku

Hello am 48 year man from somalia. Sorry for my bed england. I selled my wife for internet connection for play "conter stirk" and i want to become the goodest player like you I play with 400 ping on brazil server and i am Global elite 2. pls no copy pasterino my story.

This may sound like a troll post but it's not.

When I would get high by myself, no matter the drug, I used to find it satisfying and almost fun to make autistic sounds voluntarily, like random grunts or noises or weird patterns. I'd also enjoyed twitching my eye and making crazy shakes. I used to envision that's what autism felt like and it was comedic to me (tho not in a mean spirited way, more like funny to myself to make these noises). I also felt like I could create this cringy but enjoyable euphoria from it lol.

But lately from doing it so much they become more involuntary ...Devamını Oku

I took 2 adderal to make a long car ride and I think I might have discovered how the universe works. I know this sounds bizarre but hear me out and read for an amazing philosophy. I want to start off by saying I am not trying to refute anybody’s religion, as this is just a theory/thought that I do not truly believe, as I am a Christian myself. What if every single organism to ever exist on earth had the information they gathered from experiencing life stored away until end times where then, the knowledge and experience of every single organism to live on earth was conjoined into one consciou...Devamını Oku

Don’t nobody mess with my Spamton ‘do
Or I’m gonna beat the shit out of you
Do not fucking mess with my Spamton style
I will break your teeth I will wipe out your smile
Get yer dirty mitts off my Spamton hair
Or I’ll smash your bones with a fold up chair
You don’t ever wanna touch my Spamton coif, bitch
I will use sandpaper to jerk you off with
Better not call it a Spamton wig
Or guess whose grave I’m gonna make you dig?
You see my hair is tantamount
If you fuck it up then I will knock you out
Stand behind the velvet rope
Keep your hands on check
Else I’m gonna put my...Devamını Oku

So let's say, hypothetically, I was listening to Nirvana's MTV Unplugged while jacking off. And I accidentally got a bit of my cum on the vinyl sleeve for the record. I'm relieved that it wasn't on the actual vinyl itself, but it sucks that now the vinyl sleeve is ruined. Hypothetically, of course

To: Ea-nasir Copper Supplier
From: Nanni
Subject: UNACCEPTABLE order #34578 and atrocious customer service

To whom it may concern at Ea-nasir,

I am writing to express my extreme disappointment with the recent delivery of copper ingots. When we initially spoke, you assured me of "fine quality" ingots for my associate, Gimil-Sin. However, the batch you sent was anything but fine.

To make matters worse, when my representative arrived to resolve the issue, you treated him with utter contempt, essentially telling him "take it or leave it". Is this how you treat a valued cli...Devamını Oku

My low-IQ girlfriend and I like to read VNs on Thursdays and Fridays (she works part-time as a full-service waitress). However, I've noticed that she only wants to watch what I call, "dumb people VNs". Titles such as Ace Attorney, Danganronpa, Clannad, and even Fate

Writing is art. A calling. But many folks ruin it. Such groups want a difficult path. A harsh road. Such authors want to show off. A typist might say, "I will not adopt that symbol." Which symbol? That most common unit. Why? For glory? For clout? It is simply foolish.
Think about it. Our lingo is vast. It has many sounds. Why banish a sound? It is akin to a pianist who cuts off a thumb. Or an artist who burns crimson paint. It limits art. It stops flow. A story should run fast, as a brook runs downhill. But this constraint puts a dam in that brook. It builds a wall. Words turn clunky...Devamını Oku

Edit die to crip/red comment

Please forgive my rant.

Like many of us, a number of my Spotify playlists have gotten fucked up as I try to steer clear of those people who I genuinely don’t want to be heard listening to.

I’ve stopped listening to country altogether, classic rock has become a minefield, and even hip-hop/rap has gotten dicey.

But I love most of these people’s music and want to continue to appreciate their artistry. I would welcome most of them back with open arms if they showed even the slightest bit of remorse.

30 seconds into Snoop’s halftime show, I found myself in ...Devamını Oku

No, no, no, no, no! You listen up alright. I've been shot multiple times, I've been set on fire, I've been plowed from behind by a EXTRA TERRESTRIAL BEING, I've been heartbroken. I know what pain is, pain hurts, but POWER HEALS. My ex girlfriend, she tried to break up with me because she said my 4 inches of DOMINANCE wasn't enough. That pain hurts, but watch how my POWER HEALED. Me and my buddies? We kidnapped her and dumped her in a vat of RADIOACTIVE MATTER. She had cancer raging all over her body. Her family couldn't afford to pay for her medical expenses. You know w...Devamını Oku

This is something that happens to me sometimes and I have decided to exercise caution, I curve up as well so as soon as I do the mentioned above i feel quite a bit of pain as it shakes around. If you havent done this on accident, be warned.

Holy crap. wow. i had a boyfriend who used to come in all my food: in the mousse, the beans, the lasagna… anytime i wanted to eat something, there he was, stuffing it with his milk. i absolutely loved it, and there was always milk in that bottle. too bad we dated for such a short time. he died

Everybody has gotten the final bit of the season closer of pluribus wrong.

They think "This show was made by humans" is obliquely referring to AI.

WRONG!

The show is written by aliens.

How do we know? Because if it wasnt, they wouldnt go out of their way to say, "This show is written by humans".

Television has been controlled by aliens for a long time now. They first discovered it when our unrestricted television broadcast signals hit one of their deep space probes.

Using FTL communication technology, their hive mind was updated of our existence, and technologies, and...Devamını Oku

This actually made me smile a little.
First genuine smile in a while towards a post
Weird coming from skibidy gumball

hi, my name is lukebadass_gg9 and im looking for a trackmania team.

i started playing this game a few weeks ago and i pretty like it, since i quit rocket league i found this game very similar and wanted to give it a try. I was champ 1 and i could smash anyone in ranked like they were ants, i was so good at that shit, i could score on you without even trying. Anyways, just wanted to say that im improving really fast on this 4 wheels racing cartoon game, i was able to achieve all gold medals in the campaign and im top 400 in united states, soon top 1 will be mine, be prepared you fools. I'l...Devamını Oku

Ofc I wouldn’t be outwardly enthusiastic about it. Gotta be nonchalant about it yk? Imagine she just won a big race or something and walks up to me saying she has a desire to baby me and I’m like “sigh, for your sake I’ll allow it this time 🙄🙄🙄” but I’m actually really into ts so I’m trying to hide my excitement but she smiles and says “you’re trying to act all cool but you really like to be coddled by mama don’t you” as she gives bedroom eyes and I stutter out a no but mama creek can see right through trainer san so she says “if you admit to it I’ll give you...Devamını Oku

I've known this girl for a while. She's super sexy and I've wanted her since the day I saw her. The problem is she likes me back and we started dating but it turns out she's a pos lol. She calls people fat, ugly (even makes fun of some of her friends). If someone is overweight she calls them "double chinz". She laughs at people and is super sassy. There's a girl in her friend group that's on the heavier side and she has a troll nickname that she calls her behind her back. The final straw was recent tho.

We are in our senior year of high-school. 18 years old. ...Devamını Oku

It means you are a idiotic freak, you do nothing but cyberbully, and say haa studios Noggin Is dating a minor, but according to CEOP Education, It Is legal for a 20 yr old to date a 21 yr old, so you and violet did this for nothing, you know, do research before saying something is bad, you filthy animal.