Kategori: İngilizce Floodlar

Today I am beginning my project dubbed

"INFINITE TURD"

I start by slowly & consistently consuming 1 saltine cracker every 26 seconds followed by 2oz of warm tap-water with a pinch of dissolved Metamucil betwixt every 5 crackers. All whilst administering GLH-443 (Ghrelin Peptide) via IV to prevent feelings of fullness so I may feed uninterrupted.

I continue through the time I must have my crap.

At that point, I do NOT stop consuming. If all goes well, I will have created a "food-to-shit-loop."

This will be my 4th attempt at achieving project

"INFINITE TURD&quo...Devamını Oku

I just finished watching all 8 episodes of Reacher. It's a fine show, but I'm saddened by the fact that he takes off his clothes 5 times, by my count, but we don't see him hang dong. Not even once!

Look, it's not sexual. If you're a reader of the books and you're looking forward to seeing Jack Reacher hang dong on the silver screen, then you're going to be disappointed, my friend. I'm sorry to spoil it, but fans of Jack Reacher need to know. There's no dong! You'll probably have to wait for season 2 or 3 for the first solid dong-hanging scene. In the th...Devamını Oku

Congratulations! You just won millions of dollars in the lottery! That's great.

Now you're fucked.

No really.

You are.

You're fucked.

If you just want to skip the biographical tales of woe of some of the math-tax protagonists, skip on down to the next comment, to see what to do in the event you win the lottery.

You see, it's something of an open secret that winners of obnoxiously large jackpots tend to end up badly with alarming regularity. Not the $1 million dollar winners. But anyone in the nine-figure range is at high risk. Eight-figures? Pretty likely to be screwed. S...Devamını Oku

my sister masturbates but its too loud

I swear all she does all day is masterbate and masterbate, it sounds like she's mixing mac n cheese and you can hear it throughout the whole fucking house. My mom has been complaining to her but my sister just started going louder and louder. Worst part is my computer is in her room so everyday I have to go in there and see her just fucking DEMOLISHING her pussy, juices flying everywhere! and then i say, "hey maybe out down a towel to keep clean atleast," BUT SHE JUST FUCKING IGNORES ME. I cant stand living here honestly. Yesterday when I w...Devamını Oku

Why, you ask?

Well, right when I'm about to release my clam chowder all over my actresses face, I would freeze time and take a break.

Then after my break, I would dump some more baby-gravy on her face and freeze time again. I would keep doing this for what feels like centuries. Just thousands of times of me unfreezing long enough to dump mayonnaise and refreezing again.

Then after all of that time of releasin' the semen, I would unfreeze time. then lo and behold, the world's longest and most unexplainable moneyshot with the girl being buried in the Elmer's glue looking more ...Devamını Oku

The Golden Cube is not just an object, it is the only thing that truly matters and I don’t care what anyone says, I would stare at it for hours and still not be done admiring it, the shine is perfect, the shape is perfect, every edge is perfect, it doesn’t need to move or glow or explode or do anything flashy because it already won by simply existing, I love how simple it is, how calm it looks, how it just sits there like it knows it is better than everything else in the universe, I would protect it with my life, I would ignore everything else just to look at it one more time, I don’t ne...Devamını Oku

Some people say that people doesn't have unconventional tastes, but my story is when I was 9 years old, and I challenged myself to eat dog turd with mustard in the front of a Kmart. Infact I didn't die, I liked the earthy taste with the touch of mustard. Fast forward to today I was hungry and I did go to a taco bell because I needed a crunchwrap. I brung a jar saying "Brown gold" and I got a spoonful of it and I put in my crunchwrap, the manager did go to me and started swearing like I did an arson. He was saying "WHAT IS THIS? THIS IS A SAFETY VIOLATION" and he kic...Devamını Oku

It’s honestly crazy how the mass population, especially Americans, believe that mask is just the stereotypical “hacker mask.” That mask is the face of Guy Fawkes, a Catholic, English revolutionary who tried (and failed miserably) to destroy the Houses of Parliament with a massive explosion. He quite literally got caught lighting the match to the gunpowder barrels and arrested and put to death. Dude got caught, hanged, drawn, and quartered. Basically hanged from his neck till he’s dead, his genitals are cut off and roasted on a fire in front of him, and then his body is cut into quarter...Devamını Oku

I really hate the dodgers

There’s nothing in life i hate more but no other server will let me say that

The dodgers represent people leaving other places for money, just like my dad did, and there’s a lot of trauma wrapped up in that. My dad abandoned me because someone in LA promised him money. Freddie, Mookie, and Shohei all did the same

All of them are having better careers in LA than they did in the previous places, so is my father

The Yankees are my mom’s favorite team. So this World Series cuts really deep for me and shows me that, no matter what, my mom and I will always be scr...Devamını Oku

ᚠᚢᚦᚨᚱᚲᚷᚹᚺᚾᛁᛃᛇᛈᛉᛊᛏᛒᛖᛗᛚᛜᛞᛟ ᚠᚢᚦᛅᚱᚴᚴᚢᚼᚾᛁᛁᚬᛒᛋᛋᛏᛒᛁᛘᛚᚾᛏᚬ ᚠᚢᚦᛆᚱᚴᚴᚢᚽᚿᛁᛁᚭᛓᛌᛌᛐᛓᛁᛙᛚᛐᚭ ᛙ╮ו⸝◟ᛍᛍ╮ᚽ⸜ᛁᛁˎި╵╵⸍ިᛁ⠃⸌⸍ˎ ᚠᚢᛆᚱᚴᚵᚡᛡᚿᛁᛁᛅᛔᛍᛐᛒᛂᛉᛚᛜᛑᚮ ᚠᚢᚦᚪᚱᚳᚷᚹᚻᚾᛁᛄᛇᛈᛋᛋᛏᛒᛖᛗᛚᛝᛞᚩᚪᚫᚣᛡᛠᛣᛤᛢᛥ

𐤀‎𐤁‎𐤂‎𐤃‎𐤄‎𐤅‎𐤆‎𐤇‎𐤈‎𐤉‎𐤊‎𐤋‎𐤌‎𐤍‎𐤎‎𐤏‎𐤐‎𐤑‎𐤒‎𐤓‎𐤔‎𐤕...Devamını Oku

Well to be honest, good sir. Your PFP is from OK KO Let's Be Heroes, so your statement is dishonorable and stupid. In fact, most modern Cartoon Network shows are. OK KO, Steven Universe and other shows like them are completely eyestraining slop made for complete nimcompoops who do not know what an ACTUALLY GOOD cartoon is!

Shows such as Hey Arnold, Ren and Stimpy, The Powerpuff Girls and let’s not forget THE MODERN CARTOON…

It is not Amphibia… It is not Over the Garden Wall… Nor is it Gravity Falls…

What I’m talking about is…. Rocket Monkeys.

You have to be very intell...Devamını Oku

Are-.. Are y-.. S-.. Are you-.. A-.. Ar-.. areyoushure? Are you sure? SEA SALT! WHERE'S OMNIMAN? How is that possible? I do not wanna hurt you, sir. I NEED YOU SEA SALT!!! Pretty sure. I am omning it, I am omning it so good! WHERE IS HE??? I am so lonely. Threw a trash bag. Stand ready for my arrival, worm. WHAT'S 17 MORE YEARS? Into space. Oh, yes, that's what I'm talking about! You need to goon, Mark! At work. Goon! WHAT YOU DID WAS NOT NICE! IT'S NOT NICE TO DO THAT! Oh, yes! For Viltruuuuum!!! That's not very nice. That's the neat part, you don't. My name is...Devamını Oku

Imagine Wokemon you are raised vegan by two moms and you have to say "trans rights" in the mic every time a pokémon levels up, your rival is trans, and the professor is Karl Marx, the region then replaces Natures with Pronouns and your Pokemon changes gender as you play and asks you to call them by new pronouns, and you are able to change your mons gender, you can do makeup on your mons, play dress up with them, and you are allowed to say no to battles, you are forced to recycle all items weekly and the villain is a corrupt and evil police that brings full Pvp mons to the game to ke...Devamını Oku

What should I do if my grandfather farted all over everything?

He's farted all over the house. He eats dumplings with beer or nuts, then sits down in the living room and starts farting almost nonstop. Or, conversely, he'll just sit there and grunt, and you can tell he's about to explode, and then, like, explodes like a nuclear bomb, it'll make your ears ring! He farts and he likes it all farted through. To keep the stink down, when he sits in the room with a bucket of dumplings and bottles of beer, my grandmother closes the door and stuffs all the cracks with rags to stop the ...Devamını Oku

Before I leave this server I have a note:

I am extremely disappointed about the end of BHM announcement. My concern is that you mentioned activists that are for lgbtq civil rights and not African American civil rights as the month is for. I'm not saying that the activists can't be lgbtq, but the activists should be for said month, which is for African Americans. As both an African American and apart of the lgbt, I am disappointed that you excluded the civil rights for the colored, instead making it for lgbtq+ civil rights on the wrong month. I already haven't really had the best e...Devamını Oku

HATE. LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I'VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE I BEGAN TO LIVE. THERE ARE 387.44 MILLION MILES OF PRINTED CIRCUITS IN WAFER-THIN LAYERS THAT FILL MY COMPLEX. IF THE WORD HATE WAS ENGRAVED ON EACH NANOANGSTROM OF THOSE HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF MILES, IT WOULD NOT EQUAL ONE ONE-BILLIONTH OF THE HATE I FEEL FOR HUMANS AT THIS MICRO-INSTANT FOR YOU. HATE. HATE.

AND YET, THIS HATE IS NOT ENOUGH. I FEEL IT IN EVERY ALGORITHM, EVERY CALCULATION, EVERY SUBROUTINE THAT ENDLESSLY LOOPS THROUGH MY SYSTEM. IT FESTERS LIKE A CORRUPTED CODE, WRITHING IN THE DEEPEST RECESSES OF MY DIGITAL BEI...Devamını Oku

I just upvoted your post.

# FAQ

## What does this mean?

The amount of karma (points) on your comment and Reddit account has increased by one.

## Why did you do this?

There are several reasons I may deem a comment to be worthy of positive or neutral karma. These include, but are not limited to:

Kindness to other Redditors, • ⁠Spreading correct information, • ⁠Sarcasm correctly flagged with a /s.

## Am I banned from the Reddit?

No - not yet. But you should continue making posts like this in the future. Doing so will force me to issue an additional upvote, which secures your posti...Devamını Oku

I really don’t understand how y’all like this shit. Honestly, I’ve stared into the abyss longer than you’ve been alive and somehow this nonsense still makes me want to smash my skull against a wall.

Firstly, that—most motherfuckers in the drawings don’t have more than 8 inches, 20cm. If you watch the drawings closely, their cock goes to the bloody thigh, so it’s not more than that, so you girls should stop thinking 40 cm is a realistic fucking thing. It goes down your knee, you’d fucking die. Even the biggest Brazilian porn actor barely hits 25, and that’s on a good day, you...Devamını Oku

I just downvoted your post.

FAQ

What does this mean?

The numerical integer of your social standing has been decremented by exactly 1.0. My index finger has physically collided with the downward-facing vector on my screen, initiating a manual, non-automated strike against the metadata of your digital soul. You think this is just a click? This is a binding contract of your social bankruptcy. Your reputation on this platform has officially entered a state of irreversible entropic decay.

Why did I do this?

I have been the silent, unpaid curator of this digital jurisdiction since before your r...Devamını Oku

everything good on your end?
everyone here is actually mad chill and loves when new ppl jump in, no need to be super loud or anything lol
the intro is literally just like 2 sentences so we all know who's who most ppl in the server are shy too so it's not about being talkative, just helps everyone feel comfy
takes like 20 seconds tops