I am gonna KMS

So I was into porn at early young age maybe 7th. Now i am currently 16 So i yesterday as usual i was finding porn and stumbled across a video.Saw the video and immediately knew something was wrong(it was very bad). But idk why i felt i was hijacked by it sort of it like it controlled me and i literally bust to the video(i already was half finished). Now I literally have cried 4 times and am regreting what I did. Idk what happened to me at the moment.Guilt remorse is hitting me hard, i will feel like I am a horrible person and need to suicide. Coudnt sleep all night and do nothing in day except be filled with sadness guilt for what I did. I have ocd. I have severe anxiety. I have taken decision to completely eradicate porn from my life. Currently I can not share it with anyone nor therapist cuz i am young and will definitely seek out when i am able to earn.also i am still young so idk if its normal to get aroused by it and get erection please help me