SonalBoiiACC

Did I use a nuclear-capable intercontinental ballistic missile to respond to a home invasion? Yes. Was it proportional? No. But was it justified? Abso-fucking-lutely. He kicked the door once. Just once.
But that was enough for my threat matrix to go from “mild disturbance” to “DEFCON 1.”

I assessed the situation calmly.
I looked at my options:
🔲 Call 911
🔲 Hide under the bed
✅ Press the big red button labeled "LOL try me”

In 7 minutes, 32 states no longer existed. The intruder? Vaporized mid-step.
My home? Cratered. My will to live? Vindicated. In court, they asked; �...Devamını Oku