Pawns Aren’t Trans

Ok, so there’s a lot of memes about chess pawns being trans. This joke is inspired by the fact that when they move to the other side of the board, they can be promoted to any other piece, king excluded. Pawns often promote to a queen, hence the whole “trans” thing. But I have a theory. I believe I have uncovered some chess lore, the kings are the only male pieces on the board!

If we take a moment to assume that the story of chess takes place in a medieval matriarchal society, suddenly everything makes more sense. I believe that the two opposing factions, “Black” and “White,” are matriarchal kingdoms in which male kings are used as ceremonial figureheads, and most, if not all, positions within the military and upper government are filled by women.

My theory is backed up by the gameplay. The first example I will give is the king himself: the king is by far, the weakest piece in the game. He can only move one square at a time, is discouraged from engaging in combat, cannot engage in combat with another king, and must move out of the way of danger when possible. In layman’s terms, the king’s only purpose is to sit there and look pretty while the women do the real work. Now, contrast this to the role of the queen: she is undisputedly the most powerful piece due to her ability to move as far as she wants in any direction. Simply losing your queen can turn the tides of the game against you.

Knowing that pawns can promote to any piece except for the only established male character shows that pawns are, in fact, not trans, but rather women to begin with. The idea of a medieval society in which transgenderism is not only common but accepted and celebrated is technically possible. However, such a reality would be so far removed from our own that all current parallels shared between them would likely not be present. Thus, the idea of docile femboy pawns embracing their femininity and becoming the “queens” they are meant to be, although arousing, is highly unlikely.