Kasım 7, 2025
Ä°nsanlar yeteneklerini 30’undan sonra keÅŸfeder mi?
Merhaba 32m buradayım ve hiçbir şeyde iyi olamamaktan yoruldum.
Hiçbir zaman iyi olduğum bir şey bulamadım. Bunu hiç hissetmedim "tıklamak" bunu duydum.
Bir aktivite, konu veya konuda hiçbir zaman kendime güvenmedim ve gerçekten yetenekli olmadım.
DenemediÄŸim için de deÄŸil… O kadar çok ÅŸey denedim ki! çok uzun zamandır!
Kırılmışım gibi görünüyor ama diğer insanların sahip olduğu öğrenme veya gelişme yeteneğine sahip olmadığımı hissediyorum. Yıllardır yaptığım bir aktivitede yeni başlayanlar tarafından sürekli dövülüyorum. Ve bir ay önce başlayan biri beni yenebilir ya da benden daha iyidir.
On yıldır geliÅŸtirmeye çalıştığım birkaç ÅŸeyde baÅŸlangıç ​​seviyesindeyim…
Yani evet. Herhangi bir yeteneğe veya beceriye sahip olmamaktan bıktım. Bu yaşta en iyi dönemimde olmam gerekirken hiçbir şeyde iyi olamamak çok acıklı bir duygu.
On yıldır yapmaya çalıştığım şeylerde benim yarı yaşımdaki insanların başarılı olduğunu görmek çok üzücü. Ne kadar çalışırsam çalışayım denediğim her şeyde KÖTÜ olmaktan o kadar yoruldum ki.
Düşünmesi yasal olarak acı verici. Geçen gün bunun yüzünden neredeyse gözyaşlarına boğulacaktım.. Bundan o kadar yoruldum ki.
Bir çıkış yolu var mı? Ben ne yaparım? İnsanlar bu yaşta veya sonrasında bir yetenek veya beceri keşfetti mi?
Lütfen yardım edin veya bana umut verin, teşekkürler.
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I think JRR Tolkein wrote lord of the rings from age 45-60.
Got my first job at 33 and made over 6 figs after a couple years, so there’s hope. Plenty of jobs pays well that doesn’t require talents, or even skills, just grinds and how desperate you are for wanting to do them.
A skill is built a talent is innate. Most people heavily confuse the two. Look at videos of visual artists for example showing their very early work, you will see that for most it is art you could produce right now. And they put in the work to learn the skills.
The click moments I had were very related to trauma I experienced. So for example deep loneliness lead to wanting to know how to build and sustain healthy community and having experiences of that.
It seems that you have found many things you either dont click with or which you havent learned enough of to be skillful enough to enjoy them. You may wanna look at videos from japanese people perfecting a skill/trade for their whole life and getting enjoyment from that.
And it is possible that you arent deeply connected with your body which is where a lot of our orientation and inner guidance is found. That means maybe you have encountered things you could click with but werent present enough to notice (no blame). It is something most people in the western world are never taught. How does your yes and your no feel in your body for example?
I would bet you carry (invisible) shame which can block us a lot and lets us shrink and hide from the world and from ourselves.
Maybe your starting point is not to find that click but to connect to yourself and your body (ideally with some external support) and then take a next step with a deeper click within yourself.
And there are people of all ages starting new things and failing terribly and keeping going because the want to or they enjoy the journey or they just do whatever they aim for.
I went back to school and changed careers in my 30s, best thing I ever did!
I relate to this, and also same age. Just to say, you’re not alone in feeling this way… although I have no solution so far.
Maybe …
Sometimes talent come from doing somethjng habitually over a very long period of time .
Aint nobody is stupid or so , they just didnt have enough time to practice on it .
Give an autistic kid time and let it repeat it ,he gonna excel if he keep doing the same task over a very long period of time
Here’s what I found out at home and at work between 30 and 40:
I like speaking in front of groups. Most people hate it.
I’m really good at dealing with irate customers. By the end of the call, they are fans.
I’m an excellent writer and I love doing it because it’s easy for me.
I love to cook.
Yeah, as we say. There is no age limit for learning something and exploring anything.
Same age same feelings. I think it’s just some of us have talents that doesn’t really translates very good in today’s world. Like we could be good at pattern recognition or photographic memory etc something we use everyday but don’t realize because we’re not hunter gatherers anymore. Also some talents are just broad like visual storytelling or educating, if we don’t lean on it and work on it it’s hard to figure it out exactly how we’re suppose to do. I try to experience different stuff without putting a pressure on myself. Couldn’t find it so far, but oh well…
Never found it and after 30 I’m done trying. I don’t have the time money or energy to learn something new and pursue it.