Kasım 12, 2025
Ben yetişkin bir yetişkinim ve hiçbir şey başaramadım
Kendime göstereceğim bazı başarılara sahip, düzgün, işleyen bir yetişkin olacağımı bilmiyorum.
Gerçek şu ki, hiçbir şey başaramadım, istisnai bir şey yapmadım, liseden yeni mezun oldum, ilgimi kaybettiğim bir derece okuyorum ve zaten final öncesi sınıftayım ve yeni bir yıla başlamak için artık çok geç olduğu için bırakamıyorum.
Bu ay 21 yaşında olacağım ve kahrolası bir işim bile yok, hiç çalışmadım, evet yirmi yaşındaki bir çocuk için hiç iş sahibi olamamanın utanç verici olduğunu biliyorum ve buna engel olamıyorum. Serbest çalışmayı denedim, kodlama, video düzenleme gibi şeyler öğrenmeyi denedim ve bunların hepsinde berbat olduğumu fark ettim. Hala ailemle yaşıyorum, eğitim masraflarımı onlar ödüyor ama ücretimin yarısı yıllık burslardan karşılanıyor ve ben de her yıl bu miktarın yarısını onlara geri ödemek zorunda kalıyorum.
Arkadaşlarımın çoğunun hayatlarında tıp fakültesine gitmek, arkadaşlarıyla takılmak gibi boktan şeyler başardığını gördüğümde kendimi zavallı bir zavallı gibi hissediyorum, onları kıskanıyorum. Yakın zamanda bir ilişkiye girdim ve o da tıp fakültesinde okuyor, kendi partnerimi kıskanmaya başlıyorum, sanki en dipteymişim gibi geliyor ve tüm bunlardan asla kurtulamayacağım. Rant için özür dilerim.
Daha söylenecek çok şey var ama çok uzun olacağı için burada bırakıyorum.
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Man I was on board with the pity party stuff until I read that you were 21. Listen to me clear bro, I’m gonna save your life here-
You are 21. You are a child. You do not owe the world anything yet, in fact the world still owes you. The world and life owes you experience at this point and nothing else. That experience is going to turn you into the person who can give something back to the world and nothing else can do that IDC what anybody says.
You don’t yet realize that you’re in the time of your life that you’ll wish you could go back to forever. Stop trying to skip it and start experiencing life dude. Take the pressure off yourself. I promise you, the biggest L you can take in your 20s is idling because you’re too hard on yourself. That shit is a waste of time. I recommend going for your wildest dreams now and I that don’t always means fame and fortune either. For me it meant moving to a zen center and devoting all my time to meditation. Go experience what you really wanna experience.
And another thing. Don’t get caught in the trap of being an old soul. We all feel that way and it’s bullshit. You’re not smarter or more mature than anyone else whose your age tbh you’re all deeply immature so don’t be a tight ass and miss out on all the cool shit because you’re too busy being grown. You can be grown in your 30s, this shit sucks I assure you.
One last part tho- your 20s are the time to figure out what you wanna do for work. You cannot skip this, a revolution isn’t gonna happen. If you don’t figure out what you wanna do for work now, society will force you basically, into working some bs job for the rest of your life. So while you’re in your 20s and you’re experiencing stuff, be job hopping or trying your own gigs and experimenting and finding what you like and what don’t like when it comes to a job and start getting into the industry YOU wanna do.
But yeah bro stop being hard on yourself and go live life.
Thanks for coming to my ted talk
21 ? fml , unless youre in the us where education is impossibly prized just choose a path and walk it. Like 21 is not adult by a mile, all the things you listed are if you are not raised in an environment where it is endeared to you through childhood only learned with practice and struggle but it can be learned. You will see people who just autopilot that stuff despite being low int without ever comprehending what theyre doing but they grinded it through and get a decent paycheck. So Id recommend just choosing “something” that will pay your bills and then decide with clarity and without any burdens what you want to do.
Again 21 ? Adult ? Are you kidding me ?
Most 21 year olds haven’t achieved anything either, don’t beat yourself up
Start disciplining yourself. Start building structure in your life. Get up at the same time. Go to bed at roughly the same time. Every day. Spend 10-30 minutes looking through job sites to find a part time job. UPS is hiring. FedEx is hiring. Mall stores are hiring. They are holiday jobs, but start small.
Some basics on self care may help
If you live fairly far north, google up SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder).
* Start with going outside for 10-30 minutes every day and let the sun hit your skin. (Vitamin D)
* Open up your windows to get air exchange. CO2 builds up in places. CO2 will slow you down.
* Start exercising more.
* DRINK MORE WATER (plain old water)
* Eat better, take vitamins.
* Get a proper amount of sleep 7-9 hours no more, no less. Get up at the same time every day. Try to go to sleep at the same time.
* Look at green plants. This sounds weird, but the human eye is adapted to process a green background. It will less your eyes relax more. A nice walk in the park will solve the exercise, sunlight, and green background.
* Make sure to shower. Scrub yourself clean. Sounds stupid, but getting the dead skin off you will help.
* If you are in a dry climate, hot showers to help your lungs hydrate.
* [Sounds stupid, but it helps] Blow your nose after your hot shower. Get the junk out of your nose. Nasal rinse is an option, but that is overkill for most people.
Look up the standard healthy diet rules.
* Cut down on the sugar
* Eat more veggies.
* Eat protein.
* Limit the amount of processed food.
* Eat / get fiber in your diet.
* Limit soda (diet or regular)
* No caffeine after 7PM