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thespecialpoint
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Amk n*wi

Someone’s comment on a custom Mario 64 song

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This is really solid, I wish I’d made it. I also I wish I invented Mario himself… imagine being the “father of Mario.” You would have so much power and could craft so much of your own lore. Personally, were I able to add just three things to the official of Mario canon, I’d already have them ready in a heart beat.

1) Mario would now be able to crawl faster than he can run. Just think about it. If he were going about on all fours, it would be at least twice as effective as just two boring legs. He would also now be able to explore thin crevices and retrieve things like grapes that rolled under the fridge. The gameplay possibilities and potential fan art is literally infinite.

2) Get rid of Bowser. No more Bowser ever. He’s rude, he’s mean, and he’s scary. Nobody likes Bowser and he makes me so uncomfortable. Whenever I play a game with Bowser in it it makes me feel like I’m working at Jack In The Box for the same shift duration as my ex, Brandy. Get rid of Bowser from the Mario games and get rid of my ex Brandy from this earth.

3) Mario needs to have a hand reveal soon. He has never officially been depicted without gloves on and I’m starting to think that he might have disgusting hands. You know what I’m talking about: broken, black nails, varicose veins extending down to the wrist, and a burnt forest of knuckle hairs. How am I supposed to root for Mario if he potentially looks like this? It makes me sick to my little stomach.

Anyways, thanks for this awesome song. I think it really got the gears in my head spinning. I love Mario and I’m not afraid to show my passion in front of an online forum. Love you bye!

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