Does anyone know how to clean blood and shit out of a skirt?

Hello Reddit recently, due to an (entirely heterosexual) encounter with a dildo and skirt, I have shit myself and cannot get it out of the carpet and skirt.

Basically, I bought a 15-inch red silicone t rex bad dragon dildo (for one of my many girlfriends not me i’m not gay) but when I was taking it out of the box I fell over wierdly and accidentally slid all 15 inches deep into my ass while wearing thigh highs and a skirt and jerking off with a gag in my mouth. but it went too deep and that made me have sudden explosive diarrhoea, and I guess the dildo must have punctured something cause there was a lot of blood in it, and then I got shocked and pissed myself right when i came (accidentally), so now there’s piss blood shit and cum in the carpet and all over the thigh highs and skirt and stuff and my parents are coming round tomorrow and I can’t get it out and there’s so much shit everywhere and my apartment has this vomit-inducing smell like someone died help what do i do?